I say 12/13 because I messed up my days pretty hardcore and that was actually our 13th day of the experiment.
The next video I post is days after my last one. I forgot to make videos because
To add to this video, I have come across a couple annoying things.
When I clean I love to have youtube playing in the background. WELL I COULD NOT. I had to listen to myself sing random songs that popped into my head. Twas annoying. Especially because I got Cannon in D stuck in my head which led to me singing the Axis of Awesome 4 Chord Song. Urgh. And since I went into a cleaning frenzy I also decided that I should cook dinner for my roommate and I because why not....but I need to make sure she is coming home for dinner. Normally I could call her, no big deal, but she can't accept calls at work, but she can sporadically text. WHICH I CAN NOT. Urgh. It is Saturday May 31st at 10:11pm.
I have realized that my default setting is antisocial. And without access to my social media or texting it is making being antisocial a lot worse. Although I get out and do things and while I am out doing things I generally try to be up beat I am very used to being reclusive. When I went to visit my boyfriend today I avoided talking to his parents like they were the plague. I don't 'necessarily' have anything against them, but I said "hello" when I arrived and didn't even bother saying goodbye. I used to be really social with them too. I would go out of my way to have a conversation with them. Maybe it is because almost every attempt I have made to converse with them somehow ends up badly for me (ex. I woke up earlier than my boyfriend one day and chatted with his mom for a bit and a week later my boyfriend told me that he got in trouble with his mom for not being a good host and sleeping while I was up (not like he even knew I was up since he was downstairs and I was upstairs). I only talked to her for about 30 minutes before waking him up. But now if I spend the night and I wake up earlier than him (always) I can not stay upstairs around his parents so he doesn't get in trouble.) Anyway, back onto topic. This project is making me realize how alone I really am. On a consistent basis I talk to my boyfriend and my parents...and maybe two other friends. I have 46 contacts on my phone and at least 300+ friends on facebook but for all that...I feel alone. I can't just call anyone up and have a meaningful conversation with them. During this sort of mental breakdown I'm having I would usually fill it with mindless texts to people I occasionally chat with. Any sort of conversation with them would distract me, but now...Now I get to wallow in it. |